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“We met at a party fifty years ago. He’d just drank a yard of ale when I met him. Do you have that expression here— ‘yard of ale?’ It’s when you pour a pint of ale down a tube, straight into your throat. Anyway, he was feeling quite good. He called me ‘funny face’ that night. And he’s called me ‘funny face’ ever since. We stayed at the party so late that we missed the last bus, and on the walk home we planned our honeymoon.”

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